Hot dog makers Oscar Mayer and Ball Park are in federal court where a judge will determine whether either company broke false-advertising laws. Their CEO’s are a bunch of lying wieners.

Woodstock entered its second day of the three-day festival on this day back in 1969. Today, if you want to see naked people getting dirty and playing bongos, you have to hang out with Matthew McConaughey.

Dennis Rodman was inducted into the NBA Hall of Fame over the weekend and gave a very emotional and tearful speech. He cried so much that the tears rusted his dozens of face piercings.

Mike Myers is said to be making another Austin Powers movie. Producers hope to be able to lure Verne Troyer away from his very busy career as a garden gnome to reprise his role as Mini Me.

The city of Chicago is using a truck called “the pothole killer” which uses a mechanical arm to plug potholes with a new type of asphalt-patching material. It’s the same machine and substance that’s used to patch up Heidi Montag.

A Japanese company claims to have created a new machine that can convert used adult diapers into biofuel. I can’t wait to pull up to a Shell station and fill up my truck with Supreme Unleaded Depends.

Lady Gaga will be creating a Christmas window for Barney’s in New York that will be a re-imagined Santa’s workshop in the singer’s style. Expect naked elves making Meat-Dress Barbies.

The New York City area rules when it comes to a new list of top public transit cities. New York City also came out on top in the list of public transit with the most street-crazies, as well as the public transit that most smells of urine.